Fed up with recommendations from her lawyers that she plead guilty to charges that she bribed her daughters into college, actress Lori Loughlin announced to the Court that she intends to act as her own attorney moving forward.  “Have mercy,” the Aunt Becky actress told the judge overseeing her case Thursday afternoon as she asked for her trial to be delayed so she can prepare to act in her own defense. 

“This doesn’t seem like a great idea,” said Loughlin’s daughter, Olivia-Jade, who still isn’t really on speaking terms with her mother. “Oh, don’t worry!” said Lori, touched at her daughter’s concern, “I’m a lawyer now.” 

Speaking to a homeless guy outside of a federal courthouse, Loughlin explained that she decided last Thursday that it was finally time to take control of her destiny, so she called up a few favors and got USC to give her a law degree over the weekend.

“That’s great. But can I have some change?” asked the homeless man. “Oh, I don’t have any change, I’m sorry,” replied the actress who was able to obtain her Juris Doctrate after making several payments adding up to $250,000 to various USC administrators and faking an interest in rowing.  

“Law School is a lot of hard work, but ultimately well worth the sacrifice,” said Loughlin shortly before receiving a phone call from her former lawyer alerting her to the additional charges. 

Unconfirmed photo from Loughlin’s scholarship application