The day after equating protestors with the murderous cops that killed George Floyd, Los Angeles Police Chief Michael Moore has resigned himself to being a racist piece of shit that’s really super bad at his job.

“I didn’t mean what I said in my prepared statement last night,” Michael Moore said at the start of a 6 hour Police Commission meeting in which he actually spent part of the meeting wearing a “Blue Lives Matter” mask.

During the course of the meeting, literally thousands of citizens called for his firing after his police officers violated the rights of LA citizens by attacking peaceful protesters throughout the County with impunity.

As the afternoon went on, hundreds of speakers called for the immediate defunding of the LAPD and the passage of the Peoples Budget, which seeks to use the over 1 billion tax dollars funding the police on community services that are statistically less likely to result in the murder of innocent people and attacks on peaceful protesters.

Police Chief Moore spent the majority of the meeting rolling his eyes, thinking about the ending of Game of Thrones which he loved that prick, masturbating to the sounds of black tears and all of the people calling for his resignation, and texting officers in the field encouragements as they were literally firing rubber bullets at protesters in Hollywood and Santa Monica during the meeting.

Thanks to a lucky find on the wall of an El Segundo glory hole, I was able to get hold of Chief Moore’s cell phone and had the following text exchange with the head of the police agency that has seen over 500 people murdered by his officers. Here is an excerpt from our over 6 hour-long conversations.

The Avocado reached out to Mayor Eric Garcetti about the thousands of people calling for Chief Moore’s firing at the public meeting and why the Mayor chose not to attend. A rep for the Mayor’s told me that he was “unavailable” for the meeting, but we learned from the aesthetician threading his eyebrows this afternoon that the Mayor was aware of the community’s feelings but “didn’t care–you know what, I think we can go thinner on the left brow.”


Call for Michael Moore’s resignation.

Demand Mayor Eric Garcetti’s resign.

Vote District Attorney Jackie Lacey’s out of office because she loves cops and is a bad lady.

And support Black Lives Matter.